That was the past now this is my present..

My summer has finally come to a depressing end. I didnt enjoy the summer as much as I have in the past but at the same time I've been dreading school more than ever this year. I really dont understand why, maybe it's because of the workload I have ahead of me or maybe it's really because this is suppose to be the last year of my college career and I don't know what in god's name I am going to do with my life after this. I am seriously starting to think that maybe I'm just scared of the real world. I'm not ready to face it and once these few months pass by, the real world will come crashing down on me. I so wish I could go back and not even to when I was a kid anymore, because even that's overrated now but to freshman year(ahhh)lol. It was the greatest year of my life by far. I met so many amazingly wonderful people, people that I am kind of still close to today and amoung others things, had the fucking time of my life (excuse my french). Wow, I sound depressed when I'm really not. I'm finally a grown up, something i've wanted to be for sooooo long now and I'm in a place that alot of people would kill for. I have a daddy(yes I said daddy) who loves me dearly and who would do anything in this world for me. A grandmother who if even if she was on her last dollar would give it to me if I asked. Im in my last year of undergraduate college and I'm beginging to make something of my self. I see a bright and hopefully happy future ahead. Yes, ahead is where I need to start looking and leave my past behind. I have a good man next to me who respects and appreciates me for what and who and I am when what those things are aren't always nice.(hehe) Anyway im going to do it..u just wait and see..to be continued...